Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Fantastic Four Electronic Thing Feet

I wasn't overly enamored with the recent Fantastic Four film, but the minute I read about these wearable feet that make crashing and smashing sounds as you stomp around...well I just had to have them.
I didn't pick them up when Fantastic Four was all the...uh...rage, but I recently saw them on sale in T.K. Maxx and my heart leapt like no grown man's should upon seeing giant plastic feet.
The box is great. It's all feet.
There's a couple of bits around the edges letting you know that this is a Fantastic Four tie-in, but the bulk is taken up by a clear window showing off those big orange feet.
Once out of the box, they look even more awesome. They're huge. The box claims that they will only fit up to a man's size five, but these slipped over my size tens with no trouble.
And once they are on? It's clobberin' time. There is a vast array of destructive sounds emanating from your feet as you stomp around. I really can't do justice to the sound of glass smashing and concrete pounding that comes out of these. You really do start to feel a distinct "don't mess with me" attitude as you clomp around.
I decided to see if I could scare one of the numerous cats that we own with their awesome destructive power.
As you can see she is completely frozen with fear. Thing feet get a big tumbs up from me. They're huge and noisy. I dont know how any kid (big or small) can resist these.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Krispy Kreme England Doughnut

Krispy Kreme have jumped on the World Cup bandwagon and are seeking to fatten us up with the addition of an England doughnut to their range.
It's a standard doughnut with white icing and an England shirt slapped on top. My one bore the number 10 in celebration of our crocked striker, Michael Owen. The doughnut tasted great. The icing had a pleasant vanilla taste and you simply can't fault the distinctive flavour of a Krispy Kreme. I have one slight grumble, there was no filling in the doughnut. A big bit of red jam oozing out would have sealed it as a proper English doughnut.

Update: It appears I was somewhat hasty in my condemnation of the innards. I had basically taken a bite and given the rest to my wife. She subsequently discovered not only red jam but white cream too. I now have to proclaim this as the greatest doughnut ever. At least in footballing terms.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Football Crisp!

For breakfast this morning I thought I'd try Football Crisp! cereal. Officially licensed by FIFA (the world governing body for football) and on the shelves in time for the World Cup.
The graphics on the box show a pair of goalkeepers gloves catching cereal in a football shaped bowl. Th
ere are also plenty of dull facts dotted around the box about the various different balls used during World Cups gone to send you back to sleep. A large portion of the back is taken up telling us about the fantastic revealing vanilla balls gimmick. When milk hits the cereal a football pattern is revealed. It's no prize in the box, but I figured I'd give it a go.
The cereal has a pleasant vanilla taste that isn't too overpowering. It also turned into mini footballs when I added the milk as promised.
I'm not sure this will tear the average fan away from a full English in the morning but for those without any bacon in the fridge, this might just suffice.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Pepsi Max Coffee Cino

Anything Coke can do, eh? It's worse than Blak. At least that has essence of coffee and sugar in it. This thing will do you no harm whatsoever (assuming you ingest it as directed). If you have to have coffee flavoured soda, stick with Coke.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

England Lucky Bag

I've got some more World Cup tat in the shape of an England Lucky Bag. I find Lucky bags to be somewhat hit and miss. The Simpsons variety , for example, are excellent. Inside you'll find jokes and pranks, good quality sweets, some stickers and maybe a lolly or something. The King Kong pack on the other hand consists of just masks and colouring books and is generally a bit disappointing. I appreciate that these things are meant for kids, but I'm reviewing them on my website and I'll say what I like. So ner.
With that childish outburst in mind let's take a look at what my national football team have to offer.
Opening the pack reveals an activity and poster book. 8 pages of simple puzzles and jokes which look mildly distracting. There's also a foam tic-tac-toe game with coloured footballs substituting for the noughts and crosses, a generic three colour sticker declaring "I love football", a lollipop, some reasonably pleasant jelly sweets and a strange white plastic/sticker combo called a Top Scorer.
Oh, and a multi-coloured pencil.
I didn't have anyone to play tic-tac-toe with so I had a go at a few things within the activity book and was very pleased with my design for a new football kit.
The Top Scorer turned out to be a pretty groovy expanding frisbee. It's just a plastic circle but when you throw it with any momentum it opens out and becomes a frisbee of sorts. I don't think the change of shape particularly adds to it's altitude, but it does look cool. Sort of like a Fisher Price ninja death star. I couldn't be bothered sticking on all the stickers though.
I have to say the Top Scorer raises this Lucky Bag to just above the King Kong bag, but way below the Simpsons. The stuff inside is clearly very generic and is being stuffed inside various national team bags around Europe just in time to cash in on the World Cup.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Diet Coke Sango/Twizzler Strawz

It's yet another Coke variant and this time it's blood orange flavour. This can only be found on the shelves of Belgium and Luxembourg, and only as a diet variety (for now).
Being light, the can is silver with some unsuprising orange and red bubbles dancing up the Coke swirl. There is actually no indication that this is supposed to be blood orange...well...as far as my limited flemish translation skills would take me anyway. Maybe Sango means blood orange.
This is also the first flavour variant to be developed outside of Coca Cola's
Atlanta H.Q. and frankly it's not too good. It reminds me of the time my friend ordered orange juice and lemonade in a bar and was inadvertently served Coke and orange juice. It looked like dishwater and tasted just like Sango.
Twizzlers, however, are one of my favourite things and they've brought out some new ones called Strawz which are...uh...straws as well as Twizzlers. They're just giant, thick, strawberry flavoured Twizzlers with a hole running the length of it. I thought I'd see if if I could improve the Sango by supping it through one of these beasts.
Neither flavour particularly imposed itself on the other. The Sango remained untouched by strawberry and thankfully the Twizzler stayed Coke free. I'm not sure that it's advisable to drink Coke through a candy straw though.

Update: There's a guy from Belgium attending the same course as me and I asked him what Sango meant in Flemish/Belgiumese. He asked me to spell it, stared at me blankly and then just shook his head. Strange.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Chocolate Lucky Charms

I tried Chocolate Lucky Charms for breakfast this morning and I'm sad to report that I was disapointed. I just wasn't quite as taken with these as I was with standard Lucky Charms. You don't seem to get as much in the way of marshmallows and the maze on the back is the same as the one on normal Lucky Charms. It's even got the same hidden key marshmallow promo.
So the big distinguishing feature of these is that they are chocolate flavour (which to be fair, is what made me buy them in the first place).
The milk goes brown and they do taste of chocolate, but I think they're just too sweet.
Chocolate Lucky Charms have their own website here.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Mars/Believe Bar

The World Cup kicks off in Germany tommorow and England has worked itself into a lunatic frenzy. St. Georges flags hang from every available pole, aerial and car window. The talk around the water cooler is of metatarsal bones and robot dances. Of course, when the public imagination is caught like this someone, somewhere is wringing their hands and looking to fleece us of every bit of cash by association.
Mars, for instance, have changed the packaging on all of their bars from Mars to Believe. The notion being that if we believe that England can win (and presumably stuff our faces with chocolate bars that tie into that ethos), then win they will.
The new packaging is linked to a heavy marketing campaign involving an England fan singing that; "I believe that on July 9th in Berlin we will win". Good for him, because no one else does.
Check out the promotional website here.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Danish Licorice Sweets

As I've previously mentioned, Europeans go mad for Licorice. So I have here two bags of sweets that I purchased in Copenhagen. Original Skole-Kridt and the more sinister looking Dracula.
Skole-Kridt, I assumed meant school chalk as the sweets in the bag look like chalk and there's a blackboard on the front of the pack with the logo in what looks like chalk. However, online translators came up a blank, so maybe it means something else. Who knows?
The sweets themselves really, really look like chalk. I was beginning to suspect that I may have inadvertantly purchased an actual bag of chalk. I was even able to write on the concrete outside my house with it. So it was with some trepidation that I put it into m
y mouth and began to chew. Thankfully they are just licorice sweets. They taste a bit like licorice comfits but with an intense minty rush. They're not that bad really.

The Dracula sweets had..well..Dracula on the front in the classic cape open "I vant to suck your blood" pose. I have to comment on how dull the packets are. They're almost minimalist in their design. Three colours max, plain graphics and a to-the-point logo. No film tie-ins, no bragging about faux health properties, it's very different to what we're used to in England.
The sweets inside look like a lozenge, almost like a Fishermans Friend. The colour was dull and dusty and they looked quite unappetizing. I wish I'd heeded that thought, as these are horrible. They taste of salt. I quickly spat it out and cursed Count Dracula and his shoddy candy. This is easily the worst thing I've eaten for this blog. In fact it's one of the worst things I've ever eaten. I suppose the "Salte Lakridsbolcher" description on the bag should have wised me up a little.
I find it difficult to believe that licorice and salt is what Scandanavian kids are scoffing in playgrounds. Thank God for Haribo.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Pepsi Max Advert

I know that Europeans are supposed to be fairly liberal, but I was suprised to see this billboard dotted around Copenhagen.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Pee Wee's Playhouse Calender 1990: June

June already? A quick look at my Pee Wee calender reveals a super fly looking Conky. What's todays secret word? Slacker? That's right, I have been a bit of a slacker (arrrgggghhh) when it comes to updating my blog. However, I'm back for the month of June and I've got a few posts lined up. So click on the pictures to make 'em bigger and check back soon.